Serious Business
by Victoria LeRoux
Summary: Lazard tells Angeal that it's about time for the puppy to have a serious talk. Angeal knows that Genesis isn't helping matters at all


Title: The Talk

Summary: Lazard tells Angeal that it's about time for the puppy to have a serious talk. If only it didn't have to be *that* talk.

Length: started out as a drabble, then I went back to edit it, and this happened

A/N: T-rated. But nothing super bad. Just for remarks that hint towards lemony topics. However, there's going to be a fic that occurs a year or two after this, where _Zack_ had to give a sexual harassment course :D That'll be probably posted this weekend

_Discidium_

Angeal groaned, watching the strange expression on his pupil's face. He wanted to hit something, or at the very least, sink into the ground and never return to the surface. He was sure that he had already bitten clean through his lip a few times, because the Mako kept healing it, and that his normally impassive face was as scarlet as Genesis' cloak. He took a nervous sip of water, wondering what subject he should bumble his way through next. Lazard had ordered him to fully inform Zack, because the pup had been on a training mission at the time the trainees were informed about human nature.

The owner of said cloak was laughing at him from where he leaned against the wall. Originally, this was just going to be between Angeal and the puppy, but Genesis was caught harassing Sephiroth in the hallway. When the latter had seen Angeal and the pup wander by, the General had thrust the man on the two of them, leaving Angeal to bumble his way through the entire conversation. ANgeal wondered dully what Genesis had been harassing Sephiroth about, and dismissed it. The want-to-be poet had a death wish, and everyone knewi t.

It didn't help that Zack's eyes seemed like they were about to pop out of his head. That only served to cause Genesis to laugh harder, because Angeal kept tripping over the words. Angeal paused and opened his mouth, ready to speak in as detached a manner as possible, when he found himself being interrupted _yet again._

"Angeal, make sure you tell him about threesomes," Genesis laughed, his breath choking in his throat as the other First turned to him with an expression that looked like he had just been struck by lightening.

"Genesis, you're not helping," the normally patient SOLDIER spat out at his childhood friend, but he doubted he heard it through the peals of laughter.

"What's that?" the clueless Zack asked, and Genesis affectionately ruffled a hand in the boy's hair, with a grin. Genesis raised an eyebrow at Angeal, clearly waiting to hear the explanation at hand. Whatever Angeal came up with was sure to be amusing.

"Sir, stop it!" he protested at the manhandling of his hair, and Genesis leaned back, wickedly watching Angeal's mouth open and close like a fish's.

The boy had only been under Angeal's wing for a few months, but it was enough to make this conversation even _more_ awkward. Genesis really wasn't helping Angeal either, who looked at a loss for words. Of course, Angeal hadn't done this before, so that could be entirely why Genesis was helpfully supplying feedback and suggestions.

Sure, and probably Sephiroth was being eaten by a chocobo.

"Threesomes are…" Angeal trailed off as Genesis, taking pity on the other First, leaned down to whisper something in the cadet's ear.

"Oh," Zack murmured quietly, shocked into silence once again at the explanation. Angeal was glad he hadn't heard whatever Genesis said, he probably would have been scarred for life.

"What about stuff like bondage, and STD's, and-" Genesis was cut off by Angeal pulling out his Buster Sword threateningly. Angeal leveled it at Genesis, who looked at him cautiously.

"Genesis, how would you feel about a training session? One of those where we keep fighting until someone passes out from blood loss?" Angeal smiled softly, and Genesis shrugged.

"I'm sure that Zack and I could take anyone on," Genesis slapped a hand against Zack's back, who gulped nervously at the idea of Angeal going full out against him.

However, it was obviously not to be, because Angeal smiled softly, _again,_ and said sedately. "No. It's going to be me, Sephiroth, the Turks, and Tseng against you and the training dummy unless you shut up."

"It's supposed to be Sephiroth, Tseng and _I_, not-" Genesis cut himself off as Angeal's gaze turned flinty. The reddish brunette gulped and headed towards the door, throwing a few choice words over his shoulder. "_There are no dreams, no honor remains. The arrow had left the bow of the Goddess, all that awaits you is a somber morrow."_

Angeal sighed as he put away his sword, "I think he may have misquoted that," he muttered, but didn't comment as the door shut. The dark-haired man turned to his pupil. "Now where were we again, Zack?" he asked, and the younger of the two gulped.

"I don't remember," he muttered and Angeal nodded, twitching as he heard Genesis snicker. The man was _on the other side of the door_, and still, he could annoy Angeal.

The First sighed and shook his head, returning to the awkward conversation at hand. However, before he could do that, Zack foudn the breath to interrupt.

"Sir..." he trailed off nervously, and Angeal glanced at him.

"Stop with the sir," he said, and the pup brightened.

"I already know about all this stuff, from when I lived at Gongaga," he muttered and Angeal froze. Zack wondered if the man had just suffered through a heart attack.

"Why did you tell me?" Angeal's voice was emotionless, and Zack bit his lip before bluring out his answer.

"the General and Genesis told me not to say anything about it." Zack watched nervously as Angeal stood and walked to the door, clenching his fists as he roared to the vanished First-Class SOLDIER.

"GENESIS!"

_end_

**A/n-2**

Don't know where this came from… actually, it came from my friend whispering in my ear as I slept, 'Genesis interrupting the talk with Zack." So yeah… IT'S ALL HER FAULT

I kept most of the obviously awkward stuff out, but just assume it happened either beforehand, or after Genesis was kicked out. :D

`AvengedRomantic


End file.
